The Men I Date

I don't know what it is with the men I date, but they act like girls when
they break up with me. They cling. They won't let it go. I wear the pants in
the relationship, which I don't mind until that point. The last two guys
were strikingly similar in their break-up mode. They stalled, thought of
petty things to irritate me enough to break up with them, and yet had to
give me the exceedingly lame break up excuse. It's me, not you. I'm not
ready for this. School. Both sucked at school. My reaction to such a display
results in rage and the immediate clearing out of any mementos, pictures,
anything to do with them. And then the final act - I delete them from my
instant messenger buddy list. I cease all contact. What I did not count on
is my last boyfriend not letting go of his buddy list entry.
It all started so innocently enough (this is how they all start). I'd been
clear I did not want contact with him and yet he would think of things to
contact me about. Just to say hi. Just to say he missed me. Did I send that
package for his mother I'd been working on before we'd broken up? No matter
how many times I was clear as to my intentions for moving on and not talking
to him, he would play the part of the wounded party. Say he was sorry. Say
he messed everything up (he had). Why couldn't we be friends? He continued
to instant messenge me during times in his schedule I knew he was bored, or
had nothing to do except feel sorry for himself. I ignored him. I watched
the little alerts pop up on my Mac. I x'ed them out. Finally I found the
block option on all my instant messengers, then my e-mail inbox. I deleted
him from my phone. I thought the coast was clear. After all, he did live in
another state, so the risk of him showing up at my door was low.
2 months later he called my phone. Even though I'd deleted him from my
address book I recognized his number. The most unfortunate part was that it
occurred at my current boyfriend's house. I figured since his birthday had
been 2 days before he was feeling sorry for himself and wanted someone to
talk to. I ignored him. The strangest part about it had been that he was on
my mind the week before so much that I wanted to erase memories like Eternal
Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I figured it would be a one-time deal and
that would be it. However, last night he proved me wrong. And my mind proved
me right. Hours before he called I thought he might. I hope he gets
discouraged enough to leave me alone for good soon. And if my mind gives me
any warning again, I'll be sure to shut off my phone.